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On Feeling Sexy

Spring has arrived, so hats, scarves and bulky coats are being replaced. . . with bare skin. There’s something I deeply love about feeling the sun and breeze on my skin after a hard winter—it makes me feel alive! But as I looked around the other day, I wondered why some show quite so much skin. Don’t get me wrong—I…

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Why Single People Make Great Pastors

She said they are hesitant to promote her to the student pastor position because she is unmarried. She has a four-year pastoral ministry degree, has worked for years in student ministry at this egalitarian church, but she is about to be passed over for a man who is just graduating, but has an unaccredited ordination and a wedding band. But…

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Masturbation in Theology Class

Just last week, I was waxing eloquent on the theological meaning of our human bodies, the impact of physicality on spirituality and vice versa, the importance of listening to our bodies and giving them what they need. . . And then it came up. By “it,” I mean a question about masturbation. She raised her hand and asked, “If we’re…

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Modesty Is For Me, Not You.

There it was, in the middle of a Christian book on young women’s sexuality. The Modesty Chapter. And there it was again, a call to dress for others. Mother told Daughter she couldn’t go out in public “like that” because the boys would be staring at her boobs. Now, I didn’t see what Daughter wore—perhaps it was totally inappropriate. But…

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Bittersweet: The Annunciation and Good Friday

March 25th. The day we always celebrate the Annunciation—that incredible day when Gabriel appeared to Mary and told her she’d be pregnant, 9 months before we celebrate Jesus’ birth. But this year, the day of Annunciation is also Good Friday for the Western church. While we celebrate the Annunciation, we mourn the Good Friday. Bittersweet. Earthly beginning, and then an…

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MOMMYGUILT vs. Trust

MOMMYGUILT Yes, I think it should be one word. And yes, I think it should be all CAPS. Because sometimes it feels monolithic and threatens to take over. Before I pushed a child into this world, I felt guilt every now and then, but NOW, NOW a slight action or inaction can bring about a physical pang of MOMMYGUILT. I…

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Raise Your Voice With Me

Being silenced is terrible. I know too many who have been silenced by experiences that have taken their voice; some were not allowed to tell their story of abuse, others’ stories were stifled or not believed, and still others were silenced in different ways. And that silencing affects all uses of their voice. In order to regain the use of…

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Reverse “The Curse”

On Learning to Celebrate My Period Thoughts of menstruation take me back to that fated day when I first bled. I can still feel my anger and confusion. It was not a long-awaited sign of adulthood for me; rather, it felt dirty, shameful, and unwelcome. I deeply disliked the bodily experience that I would share with women everywhere, that would…

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The ART of Marriage

I’m only 3.5 years into my marriage, so really not far, but would you allow me to share some thoughts on what I think helps? I’m sure I have a lot more to learn, but I think we function best when we realize that marriage is an ART. Yes, ART as something beautiful that never feels done (and honestly, doesn’t always feel…

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Breaking Up Is Good (too)

The purity culture of my youth tells me that the best love story is the one where I marry the first man I ever date. To my chagrin, I have a messy break-up with that athletic high school boy that I loved. Will I forever have second best? My sister meets a man in college, dates and marries him. As…

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