When it’s hard to get or stay pregnant, everything feels heavy.
It’s heavy emotionally, it’s heavy physically—especially after miscarriage, it’s heavy financially if one considers any type of treatment, in all, it’s heavily disappointing.When it’s hard to get or stay pregnant, everything feels heavy. Click To Tweet
Last week I asked, “Why can I freely prevent conception and yet if I’m infertile only conceive at great personal cost?” Check it out here.
This week, I want to ask a different question. It’s a question that the NPR article’s title hints at, “More Women are Freezing their Eggs, But Will They Ever Use Them?”
The article points to two “uncontrollable” events:
- Finding a Partner: The main reason women freeze is that they haven’t found the partner they desire to parent with, and one wonders if they will. Relatively few frozen eggs have been thawed and used.
- Having a good cycle: A woman who thought she was super-fertile had complications during the treatment and produced significantly fewer eggs than desired. She states, “‘So that feeling of reassurance that I thought I was buying with my near $20,000 on the table — I’m still unable to control the outcome.'”
Uncontrollable events, made no more controllable by science.
I think egg freezing points to our desire to control outcomes.
At the end of the day, though, our control is severely limited.
If I freeze my eggs, I can’t control how many I get, whether the ones I get survive the thaw, and whether I will find a partner. Similar lack of control is clear in IVF, IUI, and even simply unprotected sex.
The question is, Do I find my “reassurance” in God’s love for me, without regard to whether my frozen eggs (IVF, IUI, or sex) become the baby I long for?
If I freeze my eggs (or do IVF IUI or sex), do I still trust God, and take my desire for control but ultimate lack of control seriously?
Do I do it all “lightly” so to speak—realizing that whether or not my dream of motherhood comes true, God’s path for my life is good?
Trust and hope in God is the only path to lighten the heaviness.Trust and hope in God is the only path to lighten the heaviness. Click To Tweet