“No one who walks down the aisle hopes to divorce in the future. But statistically many American marriages end in divorce. While divorce may be a relief, it is also filled with pain and questions. We need to pastor divorced people in a way that ensures they find peace with God and other Christians. Besides counsel and other help, we…
Tag: Marriage
I Married Someone from the Other Side of the World
Every marriage is the union of two very different people. My husband and I are more different than many. He grew up in Damascus, Syria, where St. Paul was converted. It’s the oldest continually inhabited city in the world. I grew up in the woods of upstate New York, in a town inhabited for about 200 years. He grew up…
Would the Proverbs 31 Woman go to College or (Gasp!) Get a Tattoo?
When I read “Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins Without Tattoos”, I immediately knew why I didn’t marry until I was 39, even though I wanted to get an MRS with my BA. My problem: I went to college, where I was taught to be “independent, loud, and immodest,” according to author Lori Alexander. My alma mater, Grove City College, though Christian,…
To My Single Friends Who Wonder Where I Went When I Got Married (and to my married friends who wonder where I went when I had kids)
I miss you. I really do. And I’m not ignoring you. I’m really not. We used to hang out. . . A LOT. We used to get coffee and dinner and hike and go to concerts and. . . I miss that! I realize that you wanted to give me privacy those first couple of months of marriage, but it’s…
The Difference Between Settling and Settling IN
I’m standing in my yard, trying to figure out where to put a fire pit. I’ve walked the perimeter, surveyed the land, and I think I want it over by the fence, just beyond the shade of the pine tree. We probably won’t camp this summer, but if we can eat outside and cook some marshmallows over a fire, it…
Wives Provide (Too)
Proverbs 31:15 has become a conundrum to me. The wife of noble character “. . . provides food for her family. . .” Wait. My Christian upbringing told me I needed a husband to be a provider—that’s not what a wife is supposed to do! Maybe the NIV is just getting it wrong, so I search other versions. . .…
Desire. Engagement. Failure. God.
My story of relationship failure is about to be published in the book Everbloom: Stories of Deeply Rooted and Transformed Lives. I’m honestly not sure how I feel about it. Everbloom is a book containing the personal stories of female authors who form the group Redbud Writers Guild. It will be released on April 25. But, as a preview, Redbud has published an…
Why Online Dating Might be Right for You
A sheepish smile used to accompany the answer, “We met online,” since there was confusion as to whether it was a good way to meet people. No longer. In fact, it seems to be an incredibly common way for adults to meet one another and date. Online dating’s been around for a while. I think it started with EHarmony’s promise…
Go to Bed Angry
When I was a child, my mother taught me never to “let the sun go down” on my anger (Eph 4:26). That meant asking for forgiveness before I turned the lights off and reconciling with my siblings before we slept. And then I got married. And my husband and I were sometimes unable to work it out, even in the…
In Praise of Slow Courtship (and Country Music) Part II
Last week, I began writing six reasons to take it slowly when dating. . . Check it out here. I gave these three reasons: 1) Marriage is not a task on the “to do” list, 2) Dating is fun in a way that marriage isn’t, and 3) It takes time to really know someone. And I’m not the only one…